Camp style v.2

My husband went to sleep away camp for six years; eight weeks per summer and I went for a grand total of, let's see, around 168 hours.

As many of us do, I found a spouse who grew up differently than I. One way our upbringings were glaringly different was how we spent our summers. He grew up with one sister and I had three brothers AND three sisters. Jewish, Christian. Camp, and, "go outside and play and come home when the streetlights come on." These differences are neither good nor bad. Since we met in 1983 (well, maybe there was some initial flirting in 1982, but that's for another article) we've navigated many waters, rising two sons and making a life for ourselves. 

One way our family differences showed up in spades, however, was in how we approached camp visiting day when our boys had their summer stints in MA and ME. I'm sharing this today because it occurs to me that we may not be the only parents whose differing upbringings influenced those precious hours we had with our kids. How? My husband had experienced visiting day many times and it was totally foreign to me. This was nothing new for him and I felt like a clueless outsider. 

Maybe, if you read my last post, you noticed I had an ‘attitude’ about bringing gifts to children on visiting day. Why? I’m not positive, but my best guess is that gift giving was not a big focus in my family growing up. My husband’s attitude was more closely aligned with the culture of many sleep away camps: showering campers with food, candy, and gifts on visiting day is normal and fun. We figured out a way to honor both our perspectives and the camp policy, and the kids were thrilled!

My bottom line on the topic of how to approach camp as well as camp visiting days is the same as I recommend to my newly-wed son and his beautiful wife. Couples create their own WE; their normal, their family. Will my kid's kids go to sleep away camp at all? For a week? For full summers for their entire childhoods? It will be their parent's decision and they'll figure it out based on their experiences, their partner's (or co-parent's) life experience and, yes, their child's personality and preferences. It's one of many decisions that will shape the lives of their littles.